If you do not respond to your spouse or partner's petition for divorce or separation or you file a response but reach an agreement, your case will be considered either a "default" or an "uncontested case." In a “true default” case, you are giving up your right to have any say in your divorce or legal separation case. Before you choose this option, make sure you read the papers your spouse or domestic partner filed very carefully. What your spouse or partner asked for in his or her papers is probably going to be what the court orders. Click to read about what your spouse or domestic partner will have to do in a "true default" situation.
Most people, however, want to take part in the decisions that are going to be made about their future. Whether you decide to not respond but get a written notarized agreement with your spouse/partner or you choose to file a response and reach an agreement with your spouse or domestic partner afterward, you will be involved in the case and will participate in the decisions that are made in your divorce or legal separation.
Whether you choose to respond or not to your spouse’s or domestic partner’s petition for divorce or legal separation, you can still work out an agreement.
In your agreement, you can both agree to end your marriage or domestic partnership. You can also agree about:
You may be able to reach an agreement on all of these issues, or only some of them. When you sign the agreement, make sure that you understand everything you are agreeing to. For some issues, like child support, when you have an agreement you have to meet certain legal requirements, so make sure you follow the rules. Read about child support agreements.
You should also get more information about spousal or partner support and custody and visitation agreements. You can get some information on this website. Click on the topic that you are interested in:
If you have questions or want to make sure the agreement is in your best interest (and that of your children if you have children), talk to a lawyer before you sign it. Click for help finding a lawyer.
If your court’s family law facilitator or self-help center helps with divorces, ask them for help too. Even if they cannot help you with the divorce itself, they may be able to help you with parts of it, like the child support and spousal or partner support.
Click to find out what steps you and your spouse/partner will need to take to complete your divorce or legal separation when:
If you are not sure if you and your spouse/partner will be able to work out an agreement, but you want to make sure you have a say in how the case proceeds, follow the instructions to file a Response, and work on trying to reach an agreement afterward.
If you do not think you and your spouse/partner will be able to work out an agreement, click for more information on contested cases.
You can file a Response and still work out an agreement with your spouse or domestic partner. Make sure you file your Response within 30 days of being served with the Petition. This is considered an "uncontested” case.
To fill out a Response and actively participate in the case, follow these steps:
Fill Out and File Your Response
Like the Petition, the Response asks for information about the length of your marriage or registered domestic partnership, and other basic information about your relationship. It will ask you what you own and what you owe, and about related issues such as child custody and visitation, child or spousal support, domestic violence, and other matters.
If you want specific legal advice about how to fill out your Response, talk to a lawyer. In a divorce or legal separation, you and your spouse or domestic partner may have disagreements so what you write on your Response can be very important and can affect the outcome of the case. Click for help finding a lawyer.
IMPORTANT! You only have 30 days to file your Response.
The days are counted from the date you were served with your spouse’s or partner’s Petition for divorce. If your spouse or partner is willing to give you more than 30 days, make sure you get this in writing and have your spouse/partner sign the “extension.”
Fill out (remember, you are the respondent):
If you have children with your spouse or domestic partner, also fill out:
Find out more about "service of process." You can have this form served on your spouse or domestic partner before the clerk stamps it — just make sure you do not serve the original.
Then, file the Proof of Service with the court clerk. (If you had your spouse or domestic partner served with an unstamped copy of the Response (Form FL-120 (video instructions ) or Form FL-123 (video instructions )), you can file the original of the Response together with the Proof of Service.)
Fill Out and Serve Your Financial Disclosure Forms
You have filed your response in your divorce or legal separation case. Now, you are ready to complete the financial disclosures needed to get divorced or legally separated. Keep in mind that you can file your financial disclosures at the same time as your response if you wish, but NO LATER than 60 days after you file your response.
California law requires that you and your spouse or domestic partner give each other written information about what you own and what you owe, and about your income and expenses. To do this, there is a set of forms you have to fill out and exchange. This is called “disclosure.”
The point of disclosure is to make sure that you and your spouse or domestic partner are aware of everything you each own and owe, separately and together, so you can divide your property and debts equally. It also gives you the financial information you need to make decisions about child and spousal or partner support.
You cannot get divorced if you do not exchange your disclosures. If you leave anything out of your paperwork, either by mistake or on purpose, your property division can be “set aside” or canceled. And your divorce case may be reopened. If the court finds out that you left anything out or lied on your disclosure forms on purpose, the court can order that any property you did not list goes to your former spouse or domestic partner. You can also be ordered to pay his or her lawyer’s fees and a fine.
The first disclosure you make is called the “preliminary declaration of disclosure.” Sometimes, you also have to make a second, final disclosure. To give your preliminary or final declaration of disclosure to your spouse or domestic partner, you must have it served in person or by mail. This means that someone, NOT you, 18 or older delivers or mails the Declaration of Disclosure (Form FL-140) to your spouse or domestic partner.
You do NOT file the preliminary Declaration of Disclosure, or the final one if you need one, with the court. Instead, each of you has to serve a copy of all the completed forms on the other. You keep the original of your disclosure forms.
You DO need to file with the court a form called the Declaration Regarding Service of Declaration of Disclosure
Preliminary Declaration of Disclosure
You MUST make your preliminary declaration of disclosure within 60 days of filing your response. Try to do it as soon as possible after you file your response. By doing it sooner rather than later, you and your spouse or domestic partner will have the information you need to divide your property and debts and to try to reach an agreement on support.
You may have received your spouse’s or domestic partner’s preliminary declaration of disclosure already. Read this paperwork carefully. Make sure your spouse or partner did not leave any information out. If your spouse or partner has written anything on his or her forms that you disagree with, make sure you fill out your forms the way you believe they should be completed.
If you want specific legal advice about how to fill out your disclosure documents, talk to a lawyer. The financial documents are very important, especially in cases where there is a lot of property or debt. And if you and your spouse or domestic partner are likely to have disagreements about these issues, what you write on your financial disclosure documents can affect the outcome of the case. It is very important to be accurate and complete, and a lawyer can help you figure out how to fill out the forms so that they accurately reflect your position. Click for help finding a lawyer.
Keep in mind that if anything changes or you have new information since you and your spouse/domestic partner exchanged your preliminary declarations of disclosure, you have to fill out and serve a new set of disclosure forms updating the other person about the new or changed information. You will also have to let the court know by filing another Declaration Regarding Service of Declaration of Disclosure (Form FL-141).
Once you have filed your Response and exchanged your preliminary declaration of disclosure, your next step is to finalize your agreement with the petitioner and file the forms required to finish your divorce. Click to find out what to do next.