Basics

There are 3 main ways to end a marriage or registered domestic partnership in California: divorce, legal separation, and annulment. It is not necessary for both spouses or domestic partners to agree to end the marriage. Either spouse or partner can decide to end the marriage, and the other spouse/partner, even if he or she does not want to get a divorce, cannot stop the process by refusing to participate in the case. If a spouse or domestic partner does not participate in the divorce case, the other spouse/partner will still be able to get a “default” judgment and the divorce will go through. 

California is a “no fault” divorce state, which means that the spouse or domestic partner that is asking for the divorce does not have to prove that the other spouse or domestic partner did something wrong.  To get a no fault divorce, 1 spouse or domestic partner has to state that the couple cannot get along. Legally, this is called “irreconcilable differences.”

After you decide how you want to end your marriage or domestic partnership, you need to plan your case ahead of time. Think about how you are going to handle your case. Planning before you start and talking to a lawyer can save you time and money as you go through the court process. And keep in mind that, normally, it does not matter who is the first to file the divorce or separation case. The court does not give any preference to the first person to file or a disadvantage to the person who responds to the case.

If you want to end a registered domestic partnership, keep in mind that starting on January 1, 2005, domestic partners must also file for dissolution (divorce), legal separation, or annulment to end their relationship. This law is still fairly new. There are many things that are still uncertain regarding property and child custody. There are also complicated tax issues since federal tax laws were not changed to recognize domestic partners. There are over 1,000 federal laws in which marital status is a factor. These include rights under Social Security, Medicare, immigration law, veterans’ benefits, and federal tax laws. Domestic partners also may not have the same rights as married persons if they leave California. This is important for parents to consider in their custody agreement. Click to read The California Domestic Partnership Law: What It Means for You and Your Family.

If you are trying to end a domestic partnership, it is important to talk to a lawyer who is knowledgeable about the law in this area. You may also want to talk to an accountant who is knowledgeable in this area.  The same is true if you became legally married to a person of the same sex during the time period when same-sex marriage was legal in California. Click for help finding a lawyer.

The family law facilitator or self-help center in your court may be able to help you with the divorce or legal separation process and help you understand what your options are, decide what you want to do, and get started with your paperwork. You can also talk to a lawyer to get legal advice.